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The most important lesson this veteran learned serving with Army Paratroopers

A few years ago I was asked at work to share my perspective as an Army veteran. The presentation I gave described the most important lesson I learned serving with paratroopers. It received a lot of positive feedback. Therefore, I thought it would be useful to share the content here.

This video includes the presentation I gave at work.

My family is full of paratroopers

I spent over a decade serving as an Officer in the US Army. I learned a lot in the Army, especially during my first tour with the 82nd Airborne Division. The division was created in World War I. It is a famous unit with a storied history. It also has a special place in my family’s heritage. My father served in the 82nd Airborne after graduating from West Point. It was his first duty assignment as an Infantry Officer. He reported to Fort Bragg in 1956.

My father served multiple tours at Fort Bragg, North Carolina.

I followed in my father’s footsteps

Many years later I followed in my father’s footsteps. I joined the 82nd in 1991 as an Infantry Officer. My first assignment was as a rifle platoon leader in Bravo Company, 1/325 Airborne Infantry Regiment. After that role, I transferred to the Signal Corps and joined the 82nd Signal Battalion. I served as a Signal Node Platoon Leader and Division Assault Command Post Platoon Leader. Yes – I was a platoon leader three different times. I finished my time at Bragg as a Company Executive Officer.

Photo from my promotion ceremony circa 1994.

Leaders jump first then other paratroopers follow

Lesson one – leaders go out the door first. The 82nd has a unique culture, full of traditions that have been created over the years. One tradition regarding their leaders is that they jump first during airborne operations. This tradition started back in WWII. What does that mean – leaders jump first. The most senior leader of any airborne operation will go out the door first, before anyone else. For example, if the Commander of the 82d (a two-star general) is part of a jump, he will jump first followed by the rest of the paratroopers.

Leaders jump first to show their commitment to the mission.

This tradition dates back to World War II

During WWII legendary commanders like Matthew Ridgway and James Gavin jumped and fought alongside their paratroopers. No cushy office for them. This act is not one of privilege, but rather of leadership in action. This tradition visibly shows all the paratroopers in the plane that you are willing to lead them by going first. The 82nd expects danger when they jump into combat. Its leaders are expected to face this danger first. This tradition demonstrates that the leaders are willing to do what they are asking their followers to do. It is a powerful way to show others that I am with you and fully committed, just like you.

General James Gavin getting ready to jump before Normandy.

A personal example of this lesson from my time with paratroopers

I learned this lesson firsthand while serving as the Division Assault CP Platoon Leader. My platoon’s mission was to support the Division Command Group with communications capabilities. We jumped in the radio equipment that the Division Commander and other senior leaders used on the drop zone during airborne operations. Many times we jumped from the same plane as the Commander. He would go out the door first, followed by his Aide, and then members of my platoon. For larger airborne operations that involved many planes, my platoon would be split into small groups and jump from several different aircraft. We would be one of the first to leave the plane so that we could land near the command group members.

Mike Steele - 82nd Airborne Division Commander. He served with my father in Vietnam. — Mike Steele – 82nd Airborne Division Commander that I supported. Great man. He served with my father in Vietnam.

Jumping into Puerto Rico was an adventure

I remember one mission where jumping first was somewhat troubling to me. For this operation, we were jumping into Puerto Rico. The drop zone was not big so we jumped from C-130s. The Division Commander was on the first airplane. I was on the second plane and would be the first jumper from that aircraft. Everything en route went fine. As we approached Puerto Rico, the Jumpmaster gave me the command to “stand in the door”. That means I am positioned in the door, waiting for the jump light to turn green. When it does, you jump.

A paratrooper jumping out of a perfectly good airplane.

Waiting can feel like an eternity

Usually, you stand in the door for less than 30 seconds. As you stand in the door of a C-130 you can see out of the aircraft. When I looked out I noticed a potential problem – all water, no land. I am a good swimmer, but I certainly did not want to experience a water landing. I peered at the jump light – it was still red. Thank God. I watched and waited, hoping that the light would not turn green until we were over land. I kept waiting for what seemed like an eternity.

Jumping at night can be particularly frightening.

Paratroopers jump when the light finally turns green

Eventually, I saw the land, then the drop zone. Next came the green light, and I jumped, followed by my fellow paratroopers. What I learned later was that the jumpmasters decided to put the first jumpers in the door earlier than normal because there was real concern that all the jumpers would not be able to exit the aircraft in time because the drop zone was so small. They did not want any paratrooper to miss the drop zone and have to ride all the way back to Fort Bragg.

Paratroopers with the 82nd Airborne jump from C-130 Hercules aircraft during a mass-tactical airborne training exercise which included over a thousand paratroopers. (U.S. Army photo by Sgt. Michael J. MacLeod) — 82nd paratroopers jump from C-130 Hercules aircraft during a mass-tactical airborne training exercise which included over a thousand paratroopers. (U.S. Army photo by Sgt. Michael J. MacLeod)

Reflecting on the lesson I learned during this operation

After the operation was complete I thought to myself what would have happened if the light had turned green while we were still over water. I knew the answer – I would have jumped. I would have done what paratroopers have been trained to do for decades. The light turns green, and then you jump. I could not turn to the paratrooper behind me and say why don’t you go first, it looks kind of dangerous with all that water.

Jumping into an airfield can also be dangerous – lots of pavement.

Leading from the rear is not an option

No – I had been trained as a leader in the 82d that you jump first, and deal with whatever happens next. You lead from the front, not from the rear. That lesson has served me well in many other situations. Sometimes when I find myself in a somewhat scary situation I think of my days in the 82nd, and what it taught me as a leader. You go out the door first.

The reality is that the only way change comes is when you lead by example.
Anne Wojcicki

Are you ready to go out the door first?

What about you? Are you ready to go out the door first? Are you fully committed to the mission of the team you lead? I hope so. If you are committed and competent others will follow you. If for no other reason than to see what happens. Not that kind of leader? Don’t be surprised if your team members are reluctant to follow you. None of us like working for someone who does not lead by example. Don’t be that guy. Instead, be the kind of leader who goes out the door first.

The place for a general in battle is where he can see the battle and get the odor of it in his nostrils. There is no substitute for the general being seen.
General James Gavin, 82nd Airborne Division Commander during WWII

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I hope you join me on this journey to raise the next generation of leaders. The world is in desperate need of more great leaders. Women and men who lead with confidence, clarity, and creativity. It’s time to become the leader that your world needs. Let’s go All The Way!

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What big changes at work do all leaders need to understand in the post-pandemic world?

I am writing a blog series about becoming a strong leader in the post-pandemic world. First I asked, Are you ready to be a strong leader in the post-pandemic world? In my last blog, I continued the conversation by listing many bold predictions that did not come to fruition in the post-pandemic world. For this blog, I will discuss three big work-related changes that all leaders need to understand to be successful in the post-pandemic world.

Work-related changes according to ChatGPT

First, let me have my new research assistant, ChatGPT, list the big work-related changes that came true during the pandemic. I checked the results and they seemed accurate to me.

Remote Work: One of the most notable changes has been the widespread adoption of remote work. Many companies transitioned to remote work models to comply with social distancing measures. Even as the pandemic has subsided in some areas, remote work remains prevalent, as businesses recognize its benefits in terms of flexibility, reduced overhead costs, and access to a broader talent pool.
Digital Transformation: The pandemic accelerated digital transformation efforts across industries. Companies invested in technologies and tools to support remote work, enhance online customer experiences, and streamline internal operations. E-commerce, online services, and digital communication platforms saw significant growth.
Hybrid Work Models: Many organizations have adopted hybrid work models, allowing employees to split their time between working remotely and in the office. This approach provides flexibility while maintaining some in-person collaboration.
Emphasis on Health and Safety: Workplace safety and hygiene became paramount. Companies implemented new health protocols, redesigned office layouts, and invested in sanitation measures to ensure the well-being of employees.
Expanded Use of Collaboration Tools: Collaboration and communication tools like Zoom, Microsoft Teams, and Slack saw a surge in usage. These tools have become essential for virtual meetings, project management, and team collaboration.
Rethinking Office Space: Some companies downsized or reimagined their office spaces to accommodate fewer employees at any given time, create more collaborative areas, and prioritize safety measures.

ChatGPT concluded that these changes have reshaped the work environment, emphasizing adaptability, technology, and employee well-being. Many of these trends are likely to continue shaping the future of work as businesses evolve and respond to ongoing challenges and opportunities. I agree with my new research assistant.

Working from home became the new normal for many people.

Three pandemic work-related changes

ChatGPT listed 15 big changes, but that is way too many for this blog. Rather I am going to focus on three big pandemic work-related changes. They are listed and briefly described below. I believe leaders must realize these changes happened and are probably here to stay. I could be completely wrong in my prediction, but I recommend you do not ignore the following three changes.

Many companies reduced their workforce – the pandemic hit most industries hard. In response companies in those sectors most affected like travel, hospitality, and entertainment were forced to reduce their workforce. It was a tough time for many.
More people worked from home – due to COVID restrictions, organizations were not allowed to have their employees in the office. Many companies pivoted, allowing their staff to work from home full-time. It was a first for me, perhaps you too.
Productivity tools were enhanced – we saw a boom in productivity tools like Zoom, MS Office, and others during the pandemic. With so many people working from home, high-tech companies rolled out new features, capabilities, and functionality.

Video meetings are much more common these days.

Three post-pandemic work-related challenges

These changes are not inherently bad. Many people would agree that changes #2 and #3 are good things. However, these shifts created correlated challenges in the post-pandemic world that leaders will need to address. Below are the related challenges.

Fewer people and resources to get the job done. Some organizations are back to full strength, but many have not fully recovered. They are still short-staffed.
More video engagement and group collaboration. With so many people still working from home video communications has become the new norm for many organizations. Video technology is much better now, but there are still challenges.
More opportunities to automate routine work. It is amazing all the automation that is available to organizations and their leaders to leverage these days. Automation can be a double-edged sword if not handled with forethought about impacts. I do not see this challenge going away any time soon with the rapid rise of AI in the workplace.

Things simply are not the same as pre-pandemic, and strong leaders will make adjustments accordingly. I believe that brighter days are ahead for many leaders and their organizations as they navigate the post-pandemic world.

I will cover all three challenges in detail

In the next several blog posts I will do a deep dive into each of these challenges, along with sharing tools and tips for how to handle the impacts they caused. We have a lot to unpack. As always I look forward to the conversation and hearing others’ perspectives about how to be a strong leader in the post-pandemic world.

Change is the province of leaders. It is the work of leaders to inspire people to do things differently, to struggle against uncertain odds, and to persevere toward a misty image of a better future.
James M. Kouzes, The Leadership Challenge: How to Make Extraordinary Things Happen in Organizations

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What bold predictions did not come to fruition in the post-pandemic world?

I drove home wondering when I would return to the office next. It was March 2020 and the pandemic was beginning. No big deal I thought to myself. It will probably last a few weeks at most. My prediction was off by years. In retrospect, it is embarrassing to acknowledge how clueless I was at the time. Like most people, I greatly underestimated the scale and complexity of the COVID-19 crisis. How were any of us supposed to know what would happen as this global debacle played out? Significant changes were coming fast and furious. The best most of us could do was try to maintain an optimistic outlook during this devastating disaster while making predictions about what would happen next.

No one anticipated the global impact of the COVID-19 crisis.

We were in unchartered waters

Big challenges were around the corner for the entire world to navigate. There were no easy answers or simple solutions. No – it would take years of effort to get past the pandemic. Leaders did their best to display confidence despite the fact that they were completely naive regarding what would happen the next day. The amount of uncertainty all of us faced was enormous. We simply did not know.

Navigating uncharted waters is precarious.

Significant changes happened during the pandemic

In this blog series, I am writing about becoming a strong leader in the post-pandemic world. In my last blog, I asked, Are you ready to be a strong leader in the post-pandemic world? If you are, then it is time to discuss the big changes that occurred during the COVID-19 crisis. The reality is that many things changed during the pandemic, but not everything did. Let’s start by separating fact from fiction. Many predictions made during the crisis did not come to fruition.

Meet my new research assistant – ChatGPT

I have been tinkering with ChatGPT. It is an innovative technology, and a game-changer in many ways. One thing that Chat GPT does well is help me with researching a new topic. It is far from perfect and sometimes not particularly precise, much less accurate. Nonetheless, ChatGPT accelerates my ability to learn quickly about a topic. Therefore, I will be using this tool as my new research assistant for this blog. I will do my best to highlight when I am leveraging ChatGPT to generate content.

Ten pandemic predictions that did not become reality

Many people made presumptive predictions about the pandemic that did not happen. I cannot recount them all, so I asked my new research assistant, ChatGPT, to list ten pandemic predictions that did not become reality. Below is the unedited list. I agree with all of them. Number ten is particularly disappointing. I was naively hoping that the pandemic would make the world a better place. It did not.

Quick Resolution: Initially, some experts and public figures hoped that the pandemic would be a short-lived crisis that could be resolved in a matter of weeks or months. This turned out to be overly optimistic.
Herd Immunity Through Infection: Early in the pandemic, there were discussions about achieving herd immunity through natural infection rather than vaccination. This idea was largely abandoned due to the high human cost it would entail.
Summer Respite: Some initially believed that warmer weather would naturally slow down or halt the spread of the virus, similar to the seasonal flu. However, the virus continued to spread throughout the summer months in various countries.
Universal Effectiveness of Lockdowns: Early in the pandemic, it was thought that strict lockdowns would quickly and effectively curtail the spread of the virus. While lockdowns did have an effect, the virus often rebounded, leading to multiple waves of infection in many places.
Low Impact on Children: Initially, it was believed that children were largely unaffected by COVID-19. While it’s true that children generally experience milder symptoms than adults, they can still spread the virus, and some have suffered from severe outcomes, including a condition known as multisystem inflammatory syndrome in children (MIS-C).
Immunity Duration: There were hopes that once a person recovered from COVID-19, they would have long-lasting immunity. While there is some immunity post-recovery, it has been found to be variable and generally not as robust or lasting as initially hoped, especially in the face of emerging variants.
One-Size-Fits-All Vaccine: Initially, there was hope for a single, universally effective vaccine. While vaccines have been developed and are effective, there are multiple types, each with varying levels of efficacy against different strains.
Unaffected Rural Areas: It was once believed that COVID-19 would primarily be an urban problem and that rural areas would be largely unaffected. However, the virus spread to rural communities as well.
Superspreader Events Only: Early on, there was a perception that only large gatherings would be superspreader events. As it turns out, the virus can and does spread in smaller gatherings and even in one-on-one settings.
Global Cooperation: There was a hopeful sentiment that the pandemic would foster unprecedented global cooperation. While there has been collaboration, there have also been significant challenges in terms of vaccine distribution, information sharing, and travel restrictions.

Three work-related predictions that did not happen

Also, several business leaders, analysts, professors, and others made bold predictions about what workplace changes we would experience during the pandemic. Similarly, many of these future forecasts did not come to fruition. Below I list three specific ones that I honestly believed were plausible at the time. I am really glad the first one did not happen given all the uncertainty we faced a few short years ago.

Global economic meltdown – some people predicted that the pandemic would trigger a worldwide economic meltdown. COVID-19 impacted almost every industry, some in hugely negative ways. But, we did not experience a global depression due to the concerted efforts of many people, including national governments.
Four-day work week – after so many employees were sent home some optimists predicted that many organizations would implement a four-day work week. Unfortunately, this did not happen for most companies. Some have experimented with this concept and made changes, but the five-day workweek is still the norm.
Collapse of coworking spaces – many people believed that when they went home to work during the pandemic they might never return to the office. Some companies dreamed about the potential cost savings getting rid of office space would generate. Fast forward to now and many people are back in the office. Some organizations still debate this topic today. From my perspective – hybrid solutions will prevail.

Sadly the four-day workweek did not become a reality.

Several predictions did come true

In this blog, I covered changes that did not happen during the pandemic. Next time, I will identify several predictions that did come true with a focus on the workplace so that leaders can prepare themselves properly for the impacts these changes are making in the post-pandemic world.

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Are you ready to be a strong leader in the post-pandemic world?

Being a leader is difficult. It was particularly challenging during the recent global pandemic. All leaders struggled to identify the best path forward as the world dealt with the COVID-19 virus. No one anticipated or expected the crisis. Even worse, leaders did not have an actual historical precedent, or proven playbook for how to respond to the pandemic. We muddled our way through it together. I believe many leaders learned from that experience and now they have to figure out how to become strong leaders in the post-pandemic world.

No one knew how long the pandemic would last.

Are you ready?

Probably not a fair question to ask. My answer is that I certainly hope that I am. Otherwise, the next few years will be rough for me as a leader. After all, we are already living in the post-pandemic world. The main point I am trying to drive home with this question is have you thought about any adjustments you need to make to be a strong leader in the post-pandemic world? I will focus on that topic during this new series of blog posts. In it, I will share a few observations about work-related changes in the post-pandemic world, the impacts they are making, and some solutions leaders can leverage to address them.

The pandemic is officially over!!!

Let’s start with the good news – the pandemic is over. On May 11th of this year, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) announced the end of the Federal COVID-19 Public Health Emergency (PHE). Whew – we are finally done dealing with this global crisis. Has everything returned to normal for everyone across the globe? No – many countries and citizens are still sorting through the aftermath. However, it is back to business as usual for many people…or is it?

The CDC declared the pandemic over earlier this year.

The COVID-19 pandemic affected everyone

Do you recall what a strange world we lived in just a few years ago? It seemed like everything came to a screeching halt as we were forced to deal with a deadly virus that could spread like wildfire. Most national leaders sent their citizens home as a precautionary measure to prevent widespread outbreaks and avoid overwhelming healthcare systems. In the beginning, I was naive enough to think the pandemic would last only a few weeks, or months at worst. Little did I know that it would keep going for several years.

Many businesses were closed much longer than predicted.

It was a scary time to be alive

The safety and well-being of the general public became the top priority around the world. The virus spread, many hospitals were overwhelmed with patients, and ventilators became scarce. Worst of all, the death toll climbed higher and higher, especially among the most vulnerable segments of our population, as the pandemic kept going with no end in sight, In response, most of us stood in long lines to get vaccinated, wore a mask out in public, and made the necessary adjustments to safeguard ourselves and our loved ones from the virus. All of us put our vacation plans on hold as the world stood still and sorted out the testing protocols and travel policies. Indeed – it was a scary time to be alive.

Wearing a mask became the abnormal norm.

Don’t forget about the pandemic

Why am I reminding myself and you about what life was like during the pandemic? I think it is vitally important to recall those days and never forget what they were like for all of us. The pandemic was unlike anything I have ever witnessed or experienced in my lifetime. The same is probably true for you as well. It impacted everyone around the globe which is perhaps unprecedented. That means we now live in a vastly different world. Therefore, I recommend all leaders consider making adjustments to be successful in the post-pandemic world.

Strong leaders learn from the past and look forward to the future

Strong leaders don’t ignore the past, they learn from it. Also, effective leaders look forward to the future. They do not remain stuck in the past or try to recreate it. In my experience, going backward is not an effective approach. This is especially true when it comes to the pandemic. I have already heard several well-intentioned leaders say they want things to go back to normal…the way they were before COVID-19 arrived. I am not sure what that means, and am completely convinced that is a bad idea. Rather, I believe we should identify what changes occurred in the workplace during the pandemic, analyze their impacts, and address the challenges they bring with practical solutions. Many things changed during the pandemic, but not everything did. Tune in next month to read my thoughts about that topic.

It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.
Charles Darwin

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The real reason engagement is vital to your success as a leader – competition

The main focus of this leadership blog during 2023 has been effective engagement. I started this topic off by explaining that strong leaders always engage their team members in a meaningful manner. In later blog posts, I shared practical tactical tips and lessons learned that leaders can leverage to engage their teams effectively. Let’s wrap up this topic with a quote from a famous female leader that reveals the real reason that meaningful engagement is vital to your success as a leader. Your team must be properly prepared for competition or else you risk losing.

“Dispirited, unmotivated, unappreciated workers cannot compete in a highly competitive world.”
Frances Hesselbein

We live in a highly competitive world

The world is a competitive place. It has always been since the dawn of time, especially in the marketplace. I cannot think of many industries that are not highly competitive these days. If you want to win you better inspire your team to do great things before your competition eats your lunch. Some days it feels like you are in a brawl at work. You are. If you don’t believe me – look around. You will notice that several businesses are closing their doors, calling it quits. Engage your team effectively and lead them to victory if you want to avoid that scenario.

Some workdays feel like you are in a tug-of-war competition.

Engage your team effectively to get their best performance and win

Frances Hesselbein is right. You need spirited, motivated, and appreciated workers to compete in the highly competitive modern world. Spirited is not a word I hear in use much nowadays. It means your team is energized, ready to take on the day. Motivation demonstrates that you and your team bring enthusiasm to the workplace. And appreciated is the secret sauce that some leaders miss. Your team feels what they do matters and they will be thanked for their efforts. Heed this advice and engage your team effectively to get their best. It is what you need to win consistently.

Frances Hesselbein led an extraordinary life dedicated to imparting lessons of leadership.

Otherwise, you will lose to your competition

If you fail to engage your team and stakeholders effectively you should expect to lose to your competition. A highly spirited and motivated team will beat their competition a majority of the time. I see this happen all the time in the marketplace. Look at the sports world. The teams that win the most are the ones who play the best day in and day out. Their leaders make sure their teams are in the right state of mind for each game. It is worth noting in professional sports that all teams prepare before every game including inspirational speeches by their leaders. An idea worth considering the next time you are getting your team ready for the next competition. I believe engagement will become even more important in the post-pandemic world.

Motivation is needed to win in a competitive environment.

Are you prepared to lead in the post-pandemic world?

Let’s face it – the COVID crisis made it even more important than ever for strong leadership in successful organizations. The whole world changed over the past few years. Strong leaders recognize the need for new strategies to be successful in the post-pandemic world and are adjusting accordingly. While others are hoping that things will return to normal (whatever that means), and may not make it much longer. The next topic I will cover in this blog is leading in a post-pandemic world.

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Another mistake to avoid as a leader is using way too much humor

Previously I wrote about a horrible mistake leaders should avoid when engaging their team members. It described leaders who are constantly obsessed with work. These leaders are a complete drag to be around. This month I will identify another horrible mistake to avoid when talking with your team members – using way too much humor.

Joking around too much with your team is another mistake to avoid

Just like being all work and no fun is a mistake to avoid as a leader. The opposite is also true. Another horrible mistake some leaders make is joking around way too much with their teams. These leaders play games, send silly text messages, and promote MEME wars on the corporate collaboration platform all day long. They are constantly trying to get everyone to laugh and like them. If humor is not kept in check your office can turn into a playground rather than a place to get work done.

Your team members expect professional leaders, not comedians

If you are in charge, then act like it. Your team members expect professional behavior from their leaders. Don’t disappoint them by acting like an uncouth comedian. What does professional behavior look like? In simple terms, that means showing up on time, acting like an adult, and treating everyone with dignity and respect. The rest will vary depending on company culture. The bottom line is that you need to be the adult in the room. Avoid acting like a professional comedian.

Don’t act like Michael Scott in The Office.

Everybody does not have to like you

Some of you may be reading this blog wondering why in the world I am writing about this topic. The reason is that I have witnessed several leaders fall into this trap. Two scenarios trigger some leaders to make this mistake – they either want everyone to like them, or it is part of their personality. Let me address the first trigger. If you are an effective leader then face the reality that not everyone will like you. At some point in time, you will make a decision that rubs one or more of your team members or other stakeholders the wrong way. Avoid trying to make everyone happy about your decision by cracking jokes. They may laugh, but that does not mean they will change their mind about your decision.

Class clown leaders are all about humor

The second trigger is personality driven. Some people enjoy constantly cracking jokes. They love to make people laugh whenever possible. It is part of who they are. We use several titles for these comical characters – class clown, practical jokester, or amateur comedian. If you are a leader and fall into this category I recommend you use discretion with your humor. Something may be funny to you, while others may find your jokes inappropriate or poorly time. It is important to think about the situation you are in before unleashing your shenanigans on others.

No one wants to work for a clown, except other clowns.

Some scenarios at work are serious business – avoid all humor

Several situations at work are serious and should be handled appropriately. I would consider the three examples below as scenarios where you should avoid all humor. Don’t make a difficult conversation worse by cracking any jokes.

Firing someone for poor performance – this scenario is generally awful for all involved. Getting fired is traumatic even for people who are expecting it.
Laying off someone due to corporate restructuring – in this scenario the organization made a decision beyond your control and you have to let someone go. Once again, expect it to be traumatic for the people affected. No one wants to be laid off.
Giving or receiving hard feedback – when things go poorly you may have to give or receive hard feedback. Some people call this tough love. In this scenario focus on the feedback only. Don’t deflect or detract from what is being said with any humor.

Three situations that are no-joke zones

I am not against the use of humor in the workplace. Humor can be an effective way to connect with your team members, build rapport with an audience, and create positive energy in a boring meeting. However, there are some situations that I consider to be “no-joke zones” that are listed below. I bet you can think of others.

Meeting with senior leadership – it is best to avoid joking around with senior leaders. They may be informal with each other, but you are not their peer. Project a professional demeanor so that they recognize that you are serious about your role.
Briefing an audience that does not know you – many people like to tell a joke during presentations. Using jokes is fine if you know the audience and they know you. If they do not I would skip the jokes to avoid any distractions from your content.
Any legal or HR conversation – I definitely avoid telling jokes at any meeting that includes a lawyer or someone from HR. Someone may be offended by your joke and the last thing you want is legal or HR to witness your blunder firsthand.

These situations may seem like no-brainers. However, I cannot recall how many times I was in one of these scenarios and someone told a joke that did not land well. Things got awkward quickly. Some leaders paid the price for being too informal.

A final warning – humor can end it all

Speaking of paying the price – let me give a final warning. Nowadays it is easy to get fired in a flash. Tell the wrong kind of joke in any workplace setting and you will likely see the exit door sooner rather than later. Below are three easy examples.

Making off-color remarks about race, gender, religion, sexual preference, etc.
Getting a laugh at one of your team member’s expense.
Telling a dirty or completely inappropriate joke.

When in doubt, don’t tell the joke. Do not be stupid when it comes to humor in the workplace. It will not end well.

One caveat – a little humor now and then is fine

Having said all that, it is perfectly fine to tell a joke now and then. In fact, it is appropriate to cut up with your team members once in a while. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I like to have fun at work. As I wrote about in the last blog – all work and no play make for dull days and low morale. Work hard and have fun.

People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.
Dale Carnegie

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Remembering a hometown hero this Memorial Day for paying the ultimate price

This weekend, we honor the fallen by commemorating Memorial Day. It is one of the most important American holidays. Many know someone who paid the ultimate price to keep us free. If you served in the military over the past few decades, you are likely aware of an empty chair at a family table somewhere this weekend. With that thought in mind, I am honoring a hometown hero I knew who sacrificed his life several years ago. Every Memorial Day, I remember Humayun Khan and pray that he will forever rest in peace.

Captain Khan’s tombstone in Arlington Cemetary.

A hero and his family face controversy

A few years ago, there was a lot of talk about Captain Humayun Khan, an American hero. His father’s comments at the 2016 Democratic National Convention created a tidal wave of media coverage. People took sides. The press stirred the pot. Instead of his death bringing Americans together, it divided us even more. I was concerned that the most important part of the story was getting lost in all the noise. So, I will share the details of Captain Khan’s heroic actions.

Political ad from 2016 that included the Khan family

I knew Humayun Khan when he was a student

He was enrolled in the University of Virginia Army ROTC program while I was an instructor there from 1999 to 2001. I remember Humayun as a fine young man. He was pretty serious, focused on success, and responsive to training. He performed well as an ROTC cadet. To be frank – he did not stand out from his peers. He fit in and showed great leadership potential like all his classmates did when they graduated from UVA and received their commissions. I did not think much about him until years later, when I learned that he was killed in action while serving in Iraq. Like everyone who knew him, I took the news hard. I could only imagine what his family was going through. I can think of no greater challenge in life than losing a child. It must be devastating. My sympathies to the Khan family.

*Khizr and Ghazala Khan announced the Humayun Khan Memorial Scholarship Fund at UVA.*

Captain Khan was a brave hero when it mattered most

It is worth discussing Captain Khan’s heroic actions when he made the ultimate sacrifice. Here is a brief description:

On June 8, 2004, Khan was inspecting a guard post when a suspicious taxicab began approaching too quickly. Ordering his subordinates away from the vehicle, Khan ran forward 10–15 steps and was killed by a suicide car bomb fitted with an improvised explosive device. The car detonated before it could reach the gates or the nearby mess hall where hundreds of soldiers were eating breakfast. Khan was also posthumously awarded the Bronze Star Medal and the Purple Heart and is buried at Arlington National Cemetery.

Plaque for Captain Khan that hangs on the Rotunda at UVA.

Several years ago, I participated in Veteran’s Day activities at a local elementary school. At that event, I shared the story of Captain Khan with the students. I explained the circumstances of his death and described three reasons why I believe he is a true American hero. It seems appropriate to share them this Memorial Day.

Captain Khan’s actions demonstrate three hero-like qualities

Captain Khan put others first. He ordered his troops to take cover to be safe while he assessed the situation. He thought about them before he thought about himself.
Captain Khan possessed the courage to face danger head-on. He did not shy away from it. It is not natural for us to put ourselves in harm’s way. In this case, he saved the lives of many by sacrificing his own.
Captain Khan built a legacy for others to emulate. His story of courage, bravery, and sacrifice should inspire us to greatness. I want to be better when I think of Khan and his sacrifice. I hope it does the same for you.

Heroes are real

I do not expect many of us to ever face a similar situation—Lord knows that I hope none of us ever do—but it is reassuring to know that we have heroes like Khan in our midst. Heroes do exist. They don’t wear capes, fly an invisible jet, or come from another planet. Rather, they are everyday people—like you and me. The difference is that they do extraordinary things when called into action.

In a twist of fate, my family used to live in the same house that the Khans owned when their son died. After we moved in, I met his family, and we exchanged letters multiple times. I will share that part of the story at another time. This blog post is about honoring a hero, Captain Humayun Khan, so I will end here.

There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
John 15:13

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What is a horrible mistake to avoid when engaging your team members?

Damn – he is here. I cannot get away from this guy. I was a young Army Officer shopping in the Post Exchange when I noticed that my company commander was also there with his wife. Captain Tasker came over to chat. He briefly introduced his wife and then rapidly shifted gears into work mode. The one-way conversation lasted all of five minutes. In that timeframe, he managed to task me with three new things that needed to be done by Monday. My plans for the weekend quickly disappeared. I could tell that Captain Tasker’s wife was embarrassed by his antics. But, he did not care. Captain Tasker seemed to make this horrible mistake over and over when engaging his team members. All work, all the time.

A horrible mistake is always tasking your team members

It is easy to become obsessed with your work. More specifically, it is not uncommon for a leader to have more tasks to complete than time available. I recall several occasions when I keep thinking about how in the world my team would get all the required work done. I recommend you avoid transferring this pressure to your team members when you engage them. What does that look like? You complain about being overwhelmed and assign more tasks to your team members every time you see them. Trust me – if all you do is talk about work when engaging your team members and always give them more to do they will start avoiding you like the plague.

Your team members are already busy

If you are an effective leader, then your team members are already busy. They are getting stuff done and making it happen. When you keep adding more work to their tall pile of tasks, it will discourage them. Even your most motivated team members are probably not looking for more to do all the time. Sure – it is important that you keep moving your team forward, focused on achieving high-priority tasks. But, be careful when it comes to delegating work. Do it with some forethought. And for heaven’s sake don’t become a leader who is known for tasking everyone all the time.

Many leaders fall into this horrible trap

I have watched so many leaders fall into this horrible trap over the years. Whenever they open their mouth it is work, work, and more work. Their entire focus is on the task at hand, not the people who will actually get it done. Many times this behavior is driven by a specific personality. One is “the commander“. Also known as an ENTJ Myers-Briggs personality type. If you are not sure if that is you – take the test. It is a worthwhile investment of your time. Another popular personality type test is DISC. Also a great tool for learning about yourself. If you score really high in D, and/or I then you may be more likely to fall into this trap.

Some personality types are extremely task-oriented.

Some conversations should not focus on work

How do you avoid this horrible mistake? Make sure some of your conversations with your team members do not focus on work. For many leaders this is easy. They know how to talk about other topics when engaging their team members. It is a natural part of their communication style. But, for others it is tough. They do not know how to talk about anything other than work and end up tasking their team in every engagement. Don’t be that kind of leader. Ask your team members about their families, their hobbies, and their interests. Anything but work every now and then. They will appreciate it, and these topics let you learn about your team members.

Coffee conversations are a good method for catching up.

One caveat – you may have no other choice in some situations

Some days you will get handed a difficult task with a tight timeline. Or your boss will tell you to put out a fire that requires immediate attention. In these scenarios, it is perfectly appropriate for a leader to focus solely on the task at hand. Your team will understand if some days it is all work and no play. Just make sure that is not every day. If your team is in firefighter mode all the time, then you have bigger problems.

There cannot be a stressful crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
Henry Kissinger

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Four lessons learned for how to effectively engage your teams

Captain Hothead was mad. Our unit returned from the field and we were missing a sensitive piece of equipment which is a big deal in the military. No one was going home until we found the missing item. Captain Hothead called his leadership team into his office and exploded on us. How did we let this happen? Why were we all so stupid? He was ranting like a lunatic, yelling and screaming for all to hear. Suddenly someone knocked on his office door and let him know the missing item was found. The problem was solved. I was a young lieutenant in the Army, wondering if I was experiencing lessons learned about how to effectively engage members of a leadership team. My hunch was correct.

No one wants to feel like a new recruit at boot camp.

Lesson Learned #1 – take the blame for any failure

Captain Hothead did not understand the first lessons learned for how to effectively engage your teams – take the blame for any failure. As a leader, it is crucial that you hold yourself accountable for all the results your team produces – the good, the bad, and even the ugly. Take the blame when your team fails. Own it. Don’t throw your team members under the bus when things do not go well. Instead – take responsibility and get busy fixing it. Some will ask why in the world would you do that if the failure is a direct result of your team members’ actions. The answer is simple. You are clearly demonstrating that you have their back when it matters most. It shows that you are with them in both the good and bad times which builds trust. Jocko Willink describes his concept of extreme ownership in the video below.

Jocko Willnik describes extreme ownership in this video.

Lesson Learned #2 – praise your team publically for successes

When your team delivers excellent results be sure to praise them publically for their success. I am amazed by the number of leaders who do not know how to do this. Rather than celebrate a victory they tell their team to get back to work right away without any acknowledgment of their success. It is not a difficult task to publically praise your team. Below are a few simple examples. Note that none of these take that much time or resources to execute.

Group meeting – give them a “shout out” during your next meeting.
E-mail your boss – send a note to your boss praising the team.
Awards – submit them for an award for their performance.
Gift – buy them a gift for a job well done. Include a thank-you note.
Team meal – take the team out for a celebratory lunch or dinner.
Team Happy Hour – gather after work to raise a glass and celebrate.

“Public praise is a force multiplier. It will boost your team’s morale and help sustain them when times get tough.”
Colonel (R) Richard J. Keating, my father

Lesson Learned #3- do not scold in public

Members of your team will make mistakes. As the leader, you will need to deal with them. Sometimes that means providing feedback or coaching. In other situations, you may need to do something more drastic like remove someone from a position, or fire them. It is vitally important that you conduct these crucial conversations in private, not public. No matter how big or bad the mistake is, do not scold anyone in public. It is humiliating, and no one wants, much less deserves that kind of treatment. Plain and simple – do not embarrass anyone in public. If you choose to ignore this lesson learned you will pay the price. I have seen it happen many times. A leader went off on someone in public and it came back to bite them later. Don’t do it. Be the better leader who handles these conversations appropriately.

Don’t treat your team like a member of the Roy family.

Lessons Learned #4 – if you make a mistake, fix it

Not only will your team members make mistakes. You will too when it comes to engaging your team. It is inevitable. My advice if you make a mistake is basic – fix it. Loopback with the person or people involved and make things right. For example, not too long ago I did not heed my own advice and scolded someone in front of others. It was the end of a long day. I was tired and hungry. I told this person rather forcefully that he took way too long wrapping up the day with a group of customers. It was a mistake to snap at this person and I knew it. Someone on our team also let me know that I embarrassed the person with my way too direct feedback. Shortly thereafter, I went to talk with the person letting him know I was sorry for my comments and appreciated all the work he had done that day. He accepted my apology and we moved forward successfully. If you make a mistake like I did don’t wait for things to get better. They won’t. In fact, it will probably get worse.

Bottom line – leverage these four lessons learned to effectively engage your team

Take the blame for any failure.
Praise your team publically for its successes.
Do not scold in public.
If you make a mistake, fix it.

When people are financially invested, they want a return. When people are emotionally invested, they want to contribute.
Simon Simek

ATW! is designed to make you a better leader

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Practical tactical tips leaders leverage to effectively engage their teams

Our Battalion Commander decided one morning that he wanted to spend time with his troops. We were many months into a peacekeeping mission and we were all bored. I volunteered to escort our commander for these visits. They were awkward. Almost no one knew our commander. He was horrible at talking with any of the troops. It was clear that this Lieutenant Colonel did not know the practical tactical tips leaders leverage to engage their team members effectively.

Many military leaders I worked with were excellent at engagement.

Practical tactical tips for effectively engaging your team members

All The Way Leadership! believes that strong leaders engage their team members in a meaningful manner. They effectively engage their team members using many methods It is important that leaders ask insightful questions to effectively engage their team members. In this post, I share some practical tactical tips (PTTs) for how to effectively engage your team. Simple advice for new leaders to follow.

Practical tactical tips can help you avoid making stupid mistakes.

Practical Tactical Tip (PTT) #1 – Your engagement must be authentic

Authenticity is a hot topic for leaders these days. There are many excellent books and articles describing how to be an authentic leader. I will keep it simple. Being yourself is the most basic definition of authenticity. I will add that it helps if you show up at work as the best version of yourself. The reason you need to be authentic is that no one likes fake engagement. Your team can tell if you are faking it, and will respond accordingly. When you engage your team – be authentic. They deserve it.

PTT#2 – Engage your team on a consistent basis

I have already written about the importance of consistency when it comes to engaging your team members. It is worth repeating here that the best way to build strong relationships with your team members is through consistent engagement. You build trust and increase mutual understanding each time you talk with your team members. Trust is critically important, especially when it comes time for a leader to have a crucial conversation. If a leader lacks rapport with their team members, it can be challenging when he tries to have a discussion about a difficult topic. Trust me – no one wants to experience an awkward interaction with their leader, especially on important issues.

Engage your team members on a consistent basis.

PTT#3 – You may need to share about yourself when you engage your team

People are usually not that comfortable talking with someone they hardly know. It is rare that you will open up to a complete stranger. This is true in life, and also at work. Therefore, it is important that your team know who you are. If you are going to engage your team in a meaningful way I recommend that you share a little about yourself when talking with them. No, you don’t need to go into excruciating details. And for heaven’s sake, do not overshare. Rather I am saying that part of being authentic is showing up as yourself at work. Share insights about who you are, what you like to do, and other tidbits that might be relevant. I have worked with some leaders who refuse to disclose any personnel information to anyone. They remained an absolute mystery to everyone which lead to strange interactions.

It is okay to share some personal details with your team members.

A final practical tip – when in doubt thank your team for the work they do

One final practical tip. If you are unsure what to talk about when engaging your team. A good place to start is by thanking them for the work they do for you. No one is going to get mad at you or think you are an ineffective leader if you give gratitude for their efforts. In fact, I believe it will have the opposite effect. Many people at work feel underappreciated for all they do. Be the kind of leader that goes out of her way to say thank you to your team members on a regular basis. It will pay dividends in the long run.

People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
Maya Angelou

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